In Eswatini as it is in Heaven

Writing this blog is bittersweet. It’s bitter in the fact that I’m writing a goodbye, but sweet in the fact that the Lord has been so kind to me to bring me to such a wonderful place. The last week I’ve been thinking a lot about my time here coming to end and in turn I have been thinking about the beginning. When we got here I had no idea what to expect. Except that I thought I was going to be serving the community as much as I could and pouring out to them. I didn’t realize they would have gifted me so much. The lord has brought me to a place of so much peace and faithfulness. The people here know the Lord. They love the Lord. In a place where their home looks a lot different than a lot of ours, where there is immense suffering, they have placed their home and their hope in the Lord.

This last week we got to serve the women of our care point. We planned a Beauty for Ashes event, which is a women’s ministry we have. On Tuesday we set up a space for our bomake and Shepard and set up chairs for them to sit in, while we sat at their feet with our bibles opened. We each took turns sharing lies the enemy has told us. Some lies were feelings of unworthiness, only feeling worthy from our works, not being enough, and not feeling seen by the Lord or feeling like our prayers are being answered. As they each shared these lies, my teams combated them with truths from the Lord found in scripture. It was so cool to see that even though we are so different, we are at different life stages and we are in different cultures, we have similar struggles. We have been fed the same lies keeping us from placing our identity and worth in the Lord.

I’m going to miss the community here. Going to church and getting to worship in english and Siswati, getting way too competitive in soccer and volleyball, talking with people in the community for hours and hearing their stories, and casually staying up all night to watch the Super Bowl. The people here were so welcoming and they have shown us so much love and fellowship. I’ve seen glimpses of Heaven being here. Glimpses of what it looks like to be in communion with the Lord with other believers from different backgrounds. Through the community and the love people have for one another because of the love they receive from the Lord. Through the way we have worshiped together. Through the beautiful creation of the Lord. Through prayer to the same God but in different languages. And through the universal language of laughter. I have seen so much faithfulness and hope. I have seen what it looks like to pick up your cross everyday and die to yourself. And I have seen what it is to live a simple but rich life. A rich life in spirit.

Goodbyes are so hard. We pour everything into making relationships with people we don’t know if we will ever see again. But isn’t that what it is to be like Christ. Giving and pouring into everyone along the way, because the Lord pours into us. He fills us so we can pour out to others. God is love. He calls us to love one another. But it’s so hard. Not the loving itself, loving those kids and women are easy. It’s the effects of loving so hard and then leaving. It’s the effects of loving so hard and then seeing their suffering. But that is why Jesus wept. The Lord weeps for us because he loves us so deeply. That is why when we left, there were many tears that fell from our faces. As we left the care point one girl came up to me and said “I will miss you, but I will see you in Heaven.” How beautiful, that the goodbyes are not goodbye forever.

I am so thankful for the life the Lord has blessed me with the last month in Eswatini. I am so thankful for the stories and the relationships. I am so thankful for the ways I have seen glimpses of Heaven.

I pray as we leave that Eswatini can continue to look and feel a little more like Heaven:)